the paddywhacks

Remember when it was socially acceptable
For your friends to grab you in the schoolyard
On your birthday
Bend you over
And give you the paddywhacks?

One whack on the ass
For each year you've been around?

Do they do that anymore?
Probably not
I would imagine that breaks
All KINDS Of laws
Somewhere.

And when you get over a certain age
The fear of severe injury becomes an issue, too.

I couldn't imagine getting slapped on my ass
37 times today
In a row
Without a break
A constant ass-slap 37 times?

Ouch.

Paddywhacks or not
I don't feel 37
But I do feel like the
Birthday Girl
Your birthday has a certain feeling
Doesn't it?

Even if the table isn't piled up with gifts
Or balloons or anything
There is still a feeling.

Hub walked in from work this morning
(He's on nights, remember?)
With my "birthday breakfast"
My Sausage McMufffin with Egg
And a hash brown
YUM.
I'll take it.
Oh yeah, and my card
No gifts this year, we decided
'Cuz we just bought the big house
I'm more of a card girl anyway.

So, the plans on my day?
A bit of shopping this morning
And then dinner tonight with my folks
And my very smart 2 year old

But, no paddywhacks.